Okay! This is my blog on getting me to be BEAST! I was coaching gymnastics and I AM BEAST was our saying so I figured I would pick it up for my fitness journey. I decided to start by telling what I feel is my story.
MY STORY:
I have realized that, like most women, I am not happy with my body. I am almost 28 (June 5th), 5'2" and 130 pounds. I realize I did not get the gene that allows me to easily eat whatever I want and remain thin. I am in no ways over weight, but seeing what side of the family I take after and working with a bunch of women who have a 15+ years on me, I realize I need to start now. I need to start now so I can make the changes I need to.
MY EARLY YEARS:
Ironically I realize I was never happy with my body. I was a competitive gymnast until I was 15. I quit because I wasn't happy and I wanted the teenager life style (big mistake). With gymnastics I was able to eat whatever I wanted because I did not gain weight. I remember being happy that I gained a pound back in 8th grade and I wrote in my diary about it. I want to have curves (ie boobs, I always had a butt) like the other girls, not all the muscle ( I had a beautiful six pack) When I quit I joined other sports such as diving and dance team but neither held up to the rigorous demands of a competitive gymnast working over 20 hours in a gym. I gained weight (70 pounds to around 115 in a year) and added some height on me. From there I continued on with my eating habits developed when I was younger such as lots of fast food, big "healthy" dinners and an extra dinner here and there at a friends. That takes me into....
MY MIDDLE YEARS (also know as college)
I continued on with my ways, surprisingly not really getting the freshman fifteen but still just kind of soft. I worked out some and was able to keep things off by working out, dancing the nights away and eating what I wanted. Somewhere in there I got the curves I wanted (ie boobs) and it was all good except I hit my highest weight at the age of 21 (stupid beer) of 135 and I realized things needed to change. I really just started eating better and lost the weight and fluctuated between 120 and 125. This continued on...
TO CURRENT DAYS:
When I was 23, I took a teaching job in Georgia, far away from my family because I realized that I need to grow up and really there were no jobs in Michigan. Over the past 5 years I have still fluctuated in my weight but the high went up to 130. I realized though that for the past 2 years I have really only bounced between 125 - 130 and it bothers me. I have been able to recognize that I have had a really stressful 2 years and maybe one day I will write about it, but I think that will be a story for another time. I do know that my body acts badly to stress though and that will help me gain.
ANY WHO:
For awhile I was okay with my body. I can recognize its not really bad, I do love that I have my curves but I realize that my soft is becoming unwanted. I feel that there has been a huge shift in society with being healthier lately (or I just didn't pay attention) and that plays a lot into my thoughts. Although I mentioned my weight often, I have been reading enough on fitness to recognize that it is not the end all be all. I would like it to go down but I would prefer the clothes I own to fit me nicer instead. I also have struggled with the fact that I don't want to give up my complete lifestyle. I LOVE FOOD, I LOVE UNHEALTHY FOOD, but I need to eat it in moderation so I do love whats most important, myself.
SO HERE WE GO:
I don't know as of right now how I hope this blog will turn out. I don't know if I will post daily, weekly or ever again. My hopes and dreams are to channel the negative thoughts into positive ones, feel like I am not depriving myself of the things I want and yet still seeing results. I do know I have a first goal point of feeling better in a bikini for a camping trip on June 21st with my friends in Michigan. SO that is where I will start tomorrow.
COUNTDOWN: 52 days until first goal of feeling better in my clothes.
